Subject: From the Jason Killam / Hand Talent Collection!
It'll take him four hours to do a hand. Then he photographs it for posterity. I cannot imagine how he does the eyes so remarkably lifelike. It took him 10 hours to do the two-handed Eagle in picture #2.
Two businessmen in Vancouver are sitting down for a break in their soon-to-be new store. The store isn't ready as only a few shelves are set up. One says to the other, 'I bet any minute now some jackass tourist is going to walk by, put his face to the window and ask what we're selling.' No sooner are the words out of his mouth when, sure enough, a curious old fellow from Saskatchewan (the Wheat Pool hat was a dead giveaway) walks to the window, has a peek, and asks, 'What are you selling here?' One of the men replies, 'Oh! We're selling assholes.' Without skipping a beat, the Saskatchewan fellow says, 'Well business must be booming. I see you only got two left!'
Bambi and Thumper
Through the lens of Tanja Askani in Alberta , Canada . He spotted these adorable little guys in his backyard. He set up a camera on his porch and wound up getting award winning photos in his own back yard!!
Sometimes friends come from unexpected places, but they are life's most special gift!
A little boy goes to his father and asks "Daddy, how was I born?"
The father answers, "Well, son, I guess one day you will need to find out anyway! ?Your Mom and I first got together in a chat room on Yahoo. ?Then I set up a date via e-mail with your Mom and we met at a cyber-cafe. ?We sneed into a secluded room, where your mother agreed to a download from my hard drive. ?As soon as I was ready to upload, we discovered that neither one of us had used a firewall, and since it was too late to hit the delete button, nine months later a little Pop-Up appeared that said:
Subject: O.J. Simpson passes on
One day in the future, OJ Simpson has a heart-attack and dies. He immediately goes to hell, where the devil is waiting for him. "I don't know what to do here," says the devil. "You are on my list, but I have no room for you. You definitely have to stay here, so I'll tell you what I'm going to do. I have a few folks here who weren't quite as bad as you. I'll let one of them go, but you have to take their place. I'll even let YOU decide who leaves."
OJ thought that sounded pretty good, so the devil opened the door to the first room. In it was Ted Kennedy and a large pool of water. Ted kept diving in and surfacing, empty handed. Over, and over, and over he dove in and surfaced with nothing. Such was his fate in hell. "No," OJ said. "I don't think so. I'm not a good swimmer, and I don't think I could do that all day long."
The devil led him to the door of the next room. In it was Al Gore with a sledgehammer and a room full of rocks. All he did was swing that hammer, time after time after time. "No, this is no good; I've got this problem with my shoulder. I would be in constant agony if all I could do was break rocks all day," commented OJ.
The devil opened a third door. Through it, OJ saw Bill Clinton, lying on the bed, his arms tied over his head, and his legs restrained in a spread-eagle pose. Bent over him was Monica Lewinsky, doing what she does best. OJ looked at this in shocked disbelief, and finally said, "Yeah man I can handle this."
The devil smiled and said . . . . . . "OK, Monica, you're free to go."
A guy took his blonde girlfriend to her first football game. They had great seats right behind their team's bench. After the game, he asked her how she liked the experience. Oh, I really liked it, she replied, especially the tight pants and all the big muscles, but I just couldn't understand why they were killing each other over 25 cents. Dumbfounded, her date asked, 'What do you mean?'
Well, they flipped a coin, one team got it and then for the rest of the game, all they kept screaming was: 'Get the quarterback! Get the quarterback!' I'm like...Helloooooo? It's only 25 cents!!!!
As Ben Franklin said: In wine there is wisdom, in beer there is freedom, in water there is bacteria. It was demonstrated that if we drink 1 liter of water each day, at the end of the year we would have absorbed more than 1 kilo of Escherichia coli, (E. coli) - bacteria found in feces. In other words, we are consuming 1 kilo of poop.. How ever, we do NOT run that risk when drinking wine & beer (or tequila, rum, whiskey, scotch or other liquor) because alcohol has to go through a purification process of boiling, filtering and/or fermenting.
Remember: Water = Poop, Wine = Health
Therefore, it's better to drink wine and talk stupid, than to drink water and be full of shit. There is no need to thank me for this valuable information: I'm doing it as a public service.
The Last Photo I Ever Took Series
Dememtia . . .
Send Prior Service Vets over 60
over 60 and the Armed Forces thinks I'm too old to track down terrorists.
(You can't be older than 42 to join the military.) They've got the whole
thing backwards. Instead of sending 18-year-olds off to fight,
they ought to take us old guys. You shouldn't be able to join
a military unit until you're at least 35. For starters:
Fantastic Marine Art. This is awesome!
HUMMER, CAMP PENDLETON, California.
POSSIBLY THE BEST ANSWER TO A STUPID QUESTION -- EVER
Katie Couric, while interviewing a Marine sniper, asked:
The Marine shrugged and replied, "A slight recoil".
Great Video! Turn up your speakers.
A United States Marine
A United States Marine was attending some college courses between asignments. He had completed missions in Iraq and Afghanistan . One of the courses had a professor who was an avowed atheist and a member of the ACLU. One day the professor shocked the class when he came in, he looked to the ceiling and flatly stated, "God, if you are real, then I want you to knock me off this platform, I'll give you exactly 15 minutes."
The lecture room fell silent. You could hear a pin drop. Ten minutes went by and the professor proclaimed, "Here I am God, I'm still waiting." It got down to the last couple of minutes when the Marine got out of his chair, went up to the professor, and cold-cocked him; knocking him off the platform. The professor was out cold. The Marine went back to his seat and sat there, silently. The other students were shocked and stunned and sat there looking on in silence. The professor eventually came to, noticeably shaken, looked at the Marine and asked, "What the heck is the matter with you?" "Why did you do that?" The Marine calmly replied, "God was too busy today protecting America 's soldiers who are protecting your right to say stupid stuff and act like an idiot, so, He sent me."
Please take time to watch this video. It is very important!
Turn up your speakers and click this link:
It is said a picture is worth a thousand words. . .
Not all the brave leave the "home of the brave" to
We have a long list of good friends whose husbands are
deploying to Iraq next month. One of the wives sent me this. We feel
compelled to send it on. Your prayers are deeply appreciated. These guys
deserve our love, our hugs and most powerfully, our prayers.
I understand that life in Iraq is very difficult to bear